Fat

You're a beautiful girl, just fat
Fat.
I never thought I would ever live this long
Even now I get angry
I thought I would die at 18, 20, 25
I kept hoping and praying that I would be taken in my sleep.
Obviously, I never did.
Doesn't mean I don't still hope.
I have built up my tolerance and walls
But it doesn't help
Fat still cuts through it all
Leaving behind holes for my soul to seep through.
So maybe when I die
Someday soon
Maybe I will make a gelatinous, ugly corpse
Or maybe a shrunken, hollow one
Either way, I will be empty inside when go